Thank you for this. It is a tricky balancing act. I sometimes berate myself by feeling that others can cope with broader social problems, like racism and gender discrimination, then why can’t I? Am I playing the victim as some state I am? What can I do about the situation? When others make you doubt yourself or things happening to you, it magnifies your challenges. So many advise you to ignore things you cannot control. Maybe, the advice should be to develop mechanisms to minimise the impact of these things on you. One way to address an external stressor is to take positive affirmative actions. Find people who are going through similar experiences. Join action groups and organisations. Help others going through similar situations.

In this way, you can validate your experiences. Validating those outside stressors can be one way of addressing the problem. Doing this protects you from feeling like a victim or an imposter. This may sound selfish, but I acquired strength from the Black Lives Matter movement. Hearing others talk about their experiences of discrimination validated my experiences. It also made me cry because I felt that for so long, others had made me feel that my responses to my experiences were extreme and invalid. I am acquiring strength from looking back at my past experiences. Yes, I cannot change them, but I am resilient. One of the challenges I face is working in a toxic positive environment where the mantra is all about celebration. I find this challenging because it can raise issues which can be triggering. The celebration mantra makes me feel that I am a failure because others have been able to overcome these challenges.