A Man from Choiseul (To the beautiful woman, who could never see this in herself)

Photo by Parks Broyles on Unsplash

You love because you despise the skin you are in, believing that it marks you as an inferior being. Every morning and night, you prayed to ask God for him (your creole lover) to love you. One can interpret this as a perverse desire because you asked God to make him love you when you did not love yourself. You invested your salvation and self-worth in him loving you. You define yourself as being ugly. Craving ‘the beautiful’, you believe that it is there you will acquire your self-esteem and worth; believing that in swallowing this poison that this would get you closer to heaven. You symbolically invest so much in one of lighter complexion to desire you.

You hoped that you would gain his affection, but all you acquired was his afflictions: disdain and indifference for you and the multitude of other women.

You fed him, catered to all his wimps and vanity. You imbued him with sanctity seeing your salvation as residing in his reciprocity.

Alas, the same way you desired him so did a legion of other women, this pathetic vain man elevated to a status beyond reason, playing treason with your hearts: the Roué decreed. At his whim, they all postulated themselves. Why, because you invested so much of your hopes and desires in the colour of his skin: he being a light…